Reversed my car into my landlord's porch step and chipped chunks off it. Found the paint to cover it and match older chips, so it blends in but now just

6 years

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Reversed my car into my landlord’s porch step and chipped chunks off it. Found the paint to cover it and match older chips, so it blends in but now just have to hope he doesn’t notice when he returns after the weekend.

New Confession

I was alone and feeling like I might want to shoot a load. Before I could my wife texted me she was out with Carol, a friend of hers that can annoy me, and they would be coming to our house in 30 minutes or so. I usually make drinks for all of us when we’re together. Before rubbing one out quickly I used a 9″ dilldough on myself which makes me ooze pre come like a leaky faucet. I let it all drip into what would be one Carol’s glass. A good amount too, maybe a kitchen tea spoon. I then worked my wood and ate my seed. When the girls got here I said “who wants a Margarita”… and served Carol’s glass to Carol and watched her drink it all x saying thanks that was perfect.

Related Confessions

I know people with disabilities can’t help it. I’m not trying to be cruel but social media needs to hide the videos because those with severe malformations look incredibly creepy. I think it could possibly give someone nightmares. I’m not trying to be cruel. Just honest. I’ve seen Halloween anamatronics look less scary than the biggest majority of them.