What I have realized is that the past year of mine was so depressing and I depended so much on others for no reason. But this one person seemed to understand me and we would have great conversations. Long story short I fell for this boy and hoped he would do the same. He showed signs that he did but you can never be sure and me and my low self esteem was definitely not sure. I mean I loved him greatly and still do. I check if he checked my Instagram stories all the time. We used to talk but not anymore. The last interaction we had was from a distance. We were not close out of nowhere. There is this b******* saying of maybe it was the wrong time and the wrong place for you guys. But no! He didn’t want me and I was wrong but whenever he wanted to talk to me I thought he liked me. He had other female friends that were interested in him. He probably was interested in them. I wanted him so badly and would daydream and he didn’t want me because he stopped talking to me. But he did play with my heart and I think he knew it. He was my light in my dark days and he used that against me. Maybe he did it on purpose or maybe he liked that someone liked him the way I did. Its a very human thing to do. But this is unrequited love because he didn’t love me. He still doesn’t. But whenever he comes back to me I accept because once I love someone I can’t just stop. I don’t have pointless crushes I have feelings that stay. I am in the path to healing. He knows I like him but he doesn’t show any signs. But you know that’s fine. I am just a hopeless romantic anyways. I just hope in this divine creation. I have someone that I can share my feelings with other than my friends and family. Therefore I have to say I am very thankful for everything I have at the moment. I just wonder sometimes where is my “one” and if they even exist. I get hopeless but what can I do but wait and see how things go? Yes I can be the best version of myself and put myself out there. I just am so done with all my unrealistic loves and I am just tired. I just wanted to share this mess with y’all thank you for reading. Pls comment if you can!
