i feel like i’m not even worth the little f****** affection or attention i get. all i do is make things worse when i talk, whether it’s to my family members, friends, or whoever the f*** else bothers talking to me. i don’t even give a f*** about anyone else that much anymore, besides myself—and him. he’s one of the few people who has actually seemed to care about me, and wants to know what i have to say. talking to him is fun, and i don’t know how i really even feel about him–if i like him as a friend, or as a romantic pursuit. i’m fine with either and i think he feels the same way. but despite all this i feel like he doesn’t want to talk to me sometimes. i’m not even worth his gaze. if he goes back to his ex i’ll be crushed even if we aren’t a thing right now, because i’m sort of actually hoping that we will be.