I binge eat. Sometimes, when I’m feeling sad, or even just for no reason at all, I just take everything in my sight and shove it down my throat. I feel empty everywhere and I just want to feel full, so I just keep jamming handful after handful of the most disgusting things into my mouth. But then I just feel worse, so I keep shoving to wash away the bad feelings. Then, when I’ve eaten so much my face hurts and my stomach is about to explode, I’ll run to the toilet and try to purge myself of my binge episode. Except as much as I shove my fingers down my throat and heave, it never leaves me. I physically cannot puke. Then I just stand there staring at myself in the mirror and hating what just happened, hating how out of control I feel. I vow to never do it again. But it happens. And the worst part is, nobody knows. Even if I told someone, they wouldn’t understand, because they all just say “oh, you’re a skinny girl, it doesn’t matter. ..you can eat anything”. But it does; nobody should eat until they feel ill and confuse their body and make themselves crazy and sick.