Chronic Backstabbing Disorder
had a dream that I was with a man who was my father lets say, for the purpose of this dream only. The Hero is looking for answers, beating up bikers, paying off informants and searching through his best friend and partner and pleads with him to stop, it won’t bring “her” back, and it just puts him in danger. A glass object falls to the floor and shatters into pieces in the early hours of the morning and suddenly it is as if all life forms are possessed from cat, human or mouse. Yet still the hero persists. What would I want to get rid of?
A few flashes of crazy scenes later, he’s getting beat on anally, by now my b*** hole is throbbing in pain like a monster is beating at my a**, possessing my negative self; it looks like it’s all going to fade to black when…something catches at a window that looks like a paw with claws of a dead hanging from a tree. When he wakes up, the friend will be terribly distraught over such burden that feels like betrayal or loss that is still holding on to something in vanity, saying he tried to get him to stop, that he warned him what would happen. Saving him is out of his hands now, it’s all on his head. Wait, what? he has seen him with other partners, informants and women less interesting then himself. So the dream makes the claw hold on to the very end, as if the dam thing were clawing out the a****** of the hero or villain here.
They genuinely like the hero and would rather he live a long and happy life and chances are he already knows the hero’s code is such that he’d just be wasting both their time by trying to be “doing it” it is just that he loves it more then he can let on but for in the dream he can reveal his real intentions of submission and desire. Still, he just might try, for old time’s sake? Compounding matters for some horrible ideal, that is either directly or indirectly responsible for much of the heroes recent suffering, and/or was covering it up.
the dream turns sour as a mysterious entity appears at the door causing fangs to flare and hisses to curse. so many animals have gone missing in the neighborhood I remind myself as number 52 ends up a wounded witch and I remind myself I went to sleep thinking of nothing but black horned witches on broom sticks and pointy hats dark skies on a farm where literally the only beautiful thing in color to be seen in the dream is a cluster of little vibrant strawberries, the rest of the scene is incredibly dark and haunting but something is pushing me there. what does the entity want of me anyway? she came to find answers about her lost dog. but I have none to give. she said my garden looked peaceful I laughed knowing its former real glory.
but the real shattering must come in the form of magic as measuring up the qualities of life to look forward to and what was or ought to have been has only given defense for the corruption to keep going as it will and has for so long keeping him waiting and holding on in the darkness, “against her will” is the darkness but like in fiction, it is common for characters on either the heroic or villainous side to betray their superiors or comrades.
Chronic Backstabbing Disorder is when a specific character constantly and successfully betrays his apparent allegiances, only to move on to a new group and repeat the pattern.
“They’re all mistakes, children! Filthy, nasty things. Glad I never was one.”
I was tortured by a depraved candy man in childhood in striped pink tails that mimics minstrels at night wearing black with whips and top hats and black cases to kill the kids in the town … I learnt love and fear and hate from him. forgot him but for the darkness of the night dreams.
Fell foul with the wrong crowd again? Never even wanted to be trophy.
the coldness in the machines near where the shattered glass fell is crying out and groaning again. so what witch or darkness? what is this thing s*** up my a**?
