A few years ago my sister tried to kill herself, and I wanted her to die. I feel like a terrible person, but no one knows how much she hurt me through all the things she did. Now I suffer worsening bouts of depression and often think about dying and how much easier it would be to just end my life. I don’t want to die, I just don’t feel able to cope with living. No one knows I feel this way, they all see me as perfectly happy, with a bright future. I don’t know how to tell them that I haven’t been okay for 6 years, that I don’t think I’m going to get into university, or that sometimes dying really does seem like the better alternative to a disappointing and lonely life.
