I’m not sure what catigory to put this under. It’s a truth, a fantasy, a pain, and a dream of mine, but there’s this friend of mine I’ve known since middle school. Let’s call him Forest, for his sake. He was always kind to me, even when I was an a** to him, and I seriously thank him for that. He’s the only person from middle school I consider a friend, and, even though I don’t always hang out with him, I do consider him my closest friend. The confession is this; I’ve wanted to s*** his c*** for years and years now. Ever since I was at least 15 or 16, I’ve wondered how long his c*** was, how it tasted, if it was circumcised or not, everything a closet cocksucker wants to know. I’ve never revealed my feelings towards him, because he’s too close a friend for me to lose, and if it turns out he isn’t into me sucking his c***, I don’t want it to be awkward between us. The closest I ever got was when he was sleeping over when we we’re younger. I had my own room at that time, which was a taste of freedom, as I have always shared a room with my brothers, and he was, as previously stated, sleeping over. He liked to stay up late and definitely watch h***** on my laptop (You’re not fooling me, I know how the internet works), and most likely j*******. Needless to say, I was pretty h**** that night, and wanted to s*** him off more than anything, but never got further than going to the bottom of my bed and just breathing heavily. You gotta understand, I was convinced I was going to ask my friend some embarrassing questions, so to say I was nervous was an understatement. He seemed to hear me (no s***), and asked if I was alright. I said yeah, and we talked a bit and joked around about sock p***. Don’t remember the specifics, but that night I learned that there was a fetish for people who like socks. We looked it up on some p*** website, but unfortunately, nothing ever came from it. I chickened out, and went to sleep. Before I got into my current fetish, I wouldn’t j******* to p***. I was a good little Christian boy, and that’s a no no. The whole reason I started watching and looking at p*** was to not think about sucking him off. It’s all I would j******* to. The feeling of his c*** in my mouth, using me as his fleshlight, and swallowing his salty load. I occasionally give him rides home from work every now and then, and every time I do, I want to take him behind the middle school and s*** him off. It’s killing me, but I’ll never do anything about it, unless he sees this and connects the dots. If you are reading this, forest, I most likely still do want to s*** your c***. Doesn’t matter when, where, or how, I want it in my mouth. You know my discord.