I’ve been meaning to let it out, for quite a long time. It’s more of a dream than of a goal now.

I really hate the emotion envy, but I let it get the best of me during my youth to my teen years. My family had financial problems and still do, and with financial problems, there’s a limit to what you can have. I was really jealous towards people who were so amazing at sports, including dancing at that too. Yeah, I could start a new sport or join dance but not when you are extremely busy, reality really s****. There may be moments when I can be by myself, but not enough time to do something useful or maybe amazing for once. I don’t know whether to hate or like PE, the sight of people so skillfully playing sports like volleyball/soccer/basketball also makes me want to show them that I am also extraordinary like them. Sure, everybody has their own talent or skill, but I can’t find mine yet. It’s a pity that during my childhood I actually had the time to play sports or anything really interesting to do but money problems and my close-minded self opposed it. My parents wanted to be tight on me, but I understood that deep in my heart. Though, that still won’t make me lose hope, I really hope I can some talents in me that could be useful.

That’s life I guess. 🙂