My wife got offended because I playfully referred to her as my girlfriend. When she objected by sternly telling me “I’m your wife not your girlfriend!” I replied “Guess what sweetheart, a wife is a permanent girlfriend.”

Why is she so attached to these silly titles Husband and Wife?

The truth of the matter is marriage is b*******. It’s just another way for the churches and state to make money off us. What does it matter as long as we’re in love and committed to each other.

Women are so caught up with their crazy ideas about how love and life that it’s no wonder us men usually die first in our old age. We’re trying to get away from the women who make us crazy over silly b*******.

I think I’m going start a drinking habit…