im a horrible person and im only 15 and i dont know what to do with myself god please save me
i tell people to kill themselves cause im jealous cause ive been hurt cause i do everything for people i love im always there for them bur they choose the people that hurt them over me they choose the person that yells at them when they cry but they come to me telling me about it and i stay there for them for hours for nighgs to make sure they feel better and i videochat if they need me but they go off a week later telling me in horrible i dont understand i went to kill her i want her dead she hurgs you why do you let her why is she your girlfriend whg is the person who gets angry at you for these things your girlfriend there’s so much better people it doesn’t even have to be me i just want you to be happy
im messed up id kill for you you’re the only reason im alive please
ive sent her death threats anonymously and you protected her and told her its okay even though shes so bad but when i get sent things you dont care yet you say im an equal stop lying to me you always lie you get angry when i lie but i dont i understand and accept you no matter what you do and no matter what but you say shes the only one who always cares and accepts you i dont ubderSTAND WHY DO YOU HATE ME I DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU I WOULD DIE IF IT MEANT YOU’D BE HAPPY I WOULD RIP MY OAN HEART OUT AND GIVE IT TO YOU IF YOU NEEDED DONT YOU SEE THAT NO MATTEE HOW MANY TIMES YOU TELL ME WE’RE JUST FRIENDS THAT ILL BE IN LOVE WITH YOU I CSNT HELP IT
i wanna hug you close and give you kissws and tell you thaf i love you and i know we’re close enough as friends for that to be normal but i want you to look me in tne eyes and tell me that you do too cause im starting to accept that maybe id rather have a best friend by my side forever instesd of no one if i mess up too bad
im sorry im a little crazy im just trying to change i wanna learn to love as a friend even if it makes me litter my body with cuts ill learn ill lesrn to make it not hurt but the idea of hsving to love someone else makes me want to stick my own hand down my throat and scratcg5my insides out makes me wanna choke on my love and let it overflow and let ypu see how much it kills me but goddamnit i swear ill lesrn to choke it down if it maked you happy i wanna do anything thag makes you happy even if that means to die someone pleass save me holy s*** i dont wanna live anymore i spend my days cutting and getting yelled at by my mom im a failure all i wanna do is get to you overseas and stay in your arms i need your comfort i need your warmth i need your soothing voice and soft hands i need you to wipe these tears away and kiss my cheek so gently
just tell me you love me, okay?
even if you dont need me i need you i need you so much
you care so little but you’re the only one who does
they want me dead baby and you don’t im so grateful you worry i like to make you worry i like to feel like i actually exist in your heart that its not just them that im there too i want to comfort you when you’re sad and always be there i wanna be there for everything i wanna hug you when you’re sad and kiss you when you’re lonely i wanna take care of you when you need it i wanna be your everything because youre5my everything god
i have no sanity left little dove im so young you ruined me
all of this love ruined me
all of the times i went around wasted to run away from my psrents i found love i shouldntve i found adult and i fell in love and i dated not a single minor but im a minor hhhh they broke me they broke everything but youve stayed with me. unlike them and i hope that ypu can fix what they broke please kill me your love heals me everytime i talk to you it builds me back up i know you dont love me like that anymore but i just need you to fix me back up fix me like im a broken doll hold me together like a shattered vase dig your handa deep into my skin glue it together with your tears and words and kisses and touches please so gentle
please so gentle
please dont shatter me again dove
you’ve done it too
youve shattered me too but i forgave you i always forgive you im your little servant how could i not
treat me like a servant like your toy
im an obedient little thing i love you
love me too
love me too.