I let myself to be drop to this level. I can do better. But recently I’ve just been simply hanging. Suspended in mid air not knowing what to do next. This night, I finally broke down. I don’t want to be here anymore. I better rise up and face these challenges head on. It might be fun wallowing around and not getting anything productive from this. Though by doing that I won’t really achieve anything. It’s pathetic. I’m wasting more and more time and energy. It will not contribute to the bigger picture. It would not contribute to my well being, not to my happiness.