the double standards really get me that my sister has been allowed to have parties with ALLL her male friends and lady friends but for some reason I have never been able to make friends well. females seem to what to bash me rather then be a real friend. and guys are abusive to me that is very very hurtful when I can’t see why I can’t have a group of friends who act FUCKEN NORMAL and who can get together and have a good time without the BS.

but I never have been able to, and its not that my parents won’t allow it. they would have allowed friends over any time years ago. but now after all the parties with my sisters stupid friends my mother won’t tolerate it.

she got sick and tired of people using computers and going through the bios. sick of making food for my sisters friends, sick of cleaning up after them. and I didn’t want to add to it asking any friends often.

now my mother won’t tolerate anything of fun! and I understand why. I really do.