I am 16 and just got a new kitten and she’s so beautiful and such a snuggly girl I love her so much, but for a few days now Ive been sleeping a lot and haven’t taken my meds and i accidentally lashed out and i hate my self so much AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYHHHHHHHH I HATE MYSELFFFFFF I also have a middle aged puppo and I’ve realized that I got him at a yoyng age and i dIDNT KNOW WHAT RESPONSIBILITY WAS AND I HAVENT TREATED HIM PROPERLY FOR SO LONG BUT I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AND I LOVE MY KITTEN SO MUCH AND I ALSO LASHED OUT AT MY MUM AND I LOVE HER SO MUCH AS WELL. and i feel so bad now because now my kitten doesn’t snuggle me anymore and she’s at the age she really absorbs experiences and learning about her owners and now she hates me and favours my mum more she used to sleep on my chest now she tries to get away from me…. aaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH.
As well as lashing out, a side effect of my withdrawal is I am very germaphoby and i need to keep everything washed and sanitized and everything so i kept giving the kitten baths and wiping her paws with baby wipes which she hates. I had a breakdown because nothing in my house is clean.
Anyway I cried harder than I ever have because I realized my dog is middle aged and doesn’t know I love him.. and now I’m ruining things with my kitten. And I don’t want anyone to die AAAAAAAAA IM SO FUXKING SAD AND FEELING EXISTENTIAL AH and i wish I could convey my screaming without looking like a cringe tumblr person