17 years
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I’m a college sophomore, and i have this friend who is a year senior. but he’s almost the same age as i am, and we’ve been friends for a year and a half. he’s nice to be around and he keeps telling me that i’m the one he opens up to, which is true upto a limit. but he tells me nothing about stuff that bothers him, and that bothers me.

when he signs off each night he adds ‘luv u’ to the msg, and gets rather upset if i dont say so. but at the same time he insists that he’s not in this for love, he doesn’t want me for a girlfriend, and that i should not misunderstand his intentions. but he basically pretends i dont exist in front of his raucous group of friends. he says it’s to protect both of us from all the needless non stop teasing that will result if they knew.and when we hang around campus, he likes to sit in a corner where not many will notice us (it’s a rather open place, and we’re in a conservative area; a boy and girl together will definitely raise eyebrows). he hasnt done anything odd except hold my hand all the time, which i think is uhh….not-so-platonic. we usually just talk after dinner, we go for a walk for an hour or something. we used to do that almost everyday. now we seem to be running out of topics. i’m usually a chatterbox but i’m always quiet around him, and he’s usually quiet but talks more with me. these days we both walk in silence, and its rather upsetting.

a lot of boundaries seem to be blurred here, and i’m not sure what to do. he’s a very sensitive guy, and i don’t want to hurt him. i ‘d like him around as a good friend, but i don’t find him particularly attractive.i’d really like some advice.

New Confession

So, one time I told my mom that I wanna buy a lollipop, I was 17 that time. My step brother then asked if he could come my mom and I agreed. Me and my step brother let’s just call him Daniel. Daniel the both of went out to buy. We bought a few things lollies and he said he wanted a beer, so I bought one for him. But on the way home walking he asked saying “I have a lollipop why would you buy one?” I looked confused. But I just said I like the strawberry flavored more. he then asked if we could go somewhere for awhile, I agreed cuz’ why not, The house is boring anyway. We went to this secluded area it’s dim but not to dark. No person is walking at that time because it’s night a bit late. We sat down on the bench right beside each other. around probably 5 minutes passed, he took my hand and hovered at top of his “DIH’ it was hard, very hard. my hand is not inside yet. He spoke “you make me this hard everyday.” mind you he was 22 at that time. I sat down still, I didn’t move one bit and just let him do what he wants to. then, he puts my hand inside and helped me stroke his “Dih” I stroked it, he started moaning softly minutes passed like that, he spoke after “Can you s*** for me?” I nodded, because what can I do? I sucked his dih and he exploded on my mouth. I thought it was done and he told me to swallow so I did. after that we didn’t tell mom nor dad it’s our little secret. that was 6 months ago, and now we both sometimes do it when we are alone.

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