I want to stop taking my meds, i want to stop going to therapy.. I miss the feeling of being on top of the world, in control and feeling the flow of life around me on a different lvl then anyone else during manic episodes with my bipolar. That exhilaration of tapping in, regardless of experience or not being better then anyone in competition, romance, work etc. Its not just a feeling, the results are there for me to prove it.. Tradeoff is the crippling lvls of sadness and depression nearly at the lvl of greiving for a loved one and being worse then everyone regardless of experience or hours put in on my downswings. But oh was it worth it compared to this medicated stupor of side affects and mood stabilizers that make me a zombie but still not functional..