I think I might be crazy. Every day I doubt that I care about any of the people I act like or say I do but then I doubt that they care about me. Are we all just pretending that anyone matters to us? Or is it genuine? There are very few people who I think I care about and even then I’m not sure if I really do. I have a girlfriend and I think I love her but I’m really not sure. I’m thinking that she has some sort of attachment to me but not to the real me. I think I’ve just managed to manipulate her into being scared of loosing me. I’ve never really trusted anyone or showed my personality to anyone. I think that if I did I would be shunned. I’m terrified of being alone but when I’m with people I don’t care what happens to them. As long as I can control them and I don’t have to rely on them for anything I’m “happy” or at least what I think happy is.
