I have everything going for me right now. I’m cruising through all of my courses with an average of 76%, I have the best group of friends I’ve ever had, I’ve already gotten into the school of my dreams and I’m excelling in my passions. I am going on a big trip next year and doing stuff I never really thought I would accomplish. It’s great. I couldn’t ask for a better life right now. So why is it that I still seriously contemplate suicide almost every day???? What’s f****** wrong with me? I am doing better than I have for years, my chronic pain is all but gone, I am genuinely feeling good about my life and myself right now. So why am I being so s*****?? Old habits f****** die hard I guess? IMaybe I am not doing as well as I think I’m doing? I suppose I should see a therapist to work through all the stuff I thought I’d left behind.