Let it OUT and
Feel good about it

So I’m in high school and I know this may sound super cheesy but Ive been in love with this guy who I had one class with for over a year now. Sounds pretty normal right? Wrong. 1. He’s in a relationship. 2. He flirted so hard with me so hard and knew I knew it. For example: we were sitting in the back of the room, and another one of my friends comes over and looks at us laughing uncontrollably about something and says ” I feel like you two are secretly in love” and me in defense of my humanity and dignity says “nooo” half sarcastically, but he says nothing and instead turns his head down and looks at me. Another example: we were sitting on the floor for a class game or something. And it was lunch so he gets up first then proceeds to put his hands out to help me up- which I take almost instantly. And as soon as I get up he does the whole ” what’s that ( when they look and Point as the floor then hit you w their finger) and when he lifts his finger hits my lips and not my nose. And doesn’t apologize for it. And instead looks straight at me and smiles then walks into the hallway to get his girlfriend. Okay so back to why things are crazy- I am now currently in a relationship of a little over a month and even though I’m super happy with him and such, I still think about this other guy. And it makes me want to cry at times. 4. Only a few days after I started my relationship, this guy broke up with his girlfriend and made me question everything. I thought ” how is this happening” but it did, granted they are now back together, but it still happened. And I guess it just bothers bc the girl he is with is not super outgoing like he is and he never looks happy w her in public, but in pictures. And I know if I was with him, I would treasure every second and not be afraid in any way to show him off. While she very much is. And it just hurts to see that when you love someone, and there are signs that they love you back, that even then it can’t work bc of timing.