I want to f*ck the pumpkin dance man. It’s really weird because you can’t even see his face. The goofy way he dances and the skin-tight black suit which delicately lines his body is enough to get my mind racing. I watch the video several times a day and I’ve even masturbated to it once. I’m a guy and I’ve never felt any kind of attraction to another man, but he gets me hard every time. I’ve rejected girls because somewhere deep in my mind, I always think ‘not as cute as pumpkin man’. I don’t know what to do.

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