My brother just slapped me, my face feels numb and it’s really hot to the touch. He dragged me across the living room by the neck and slammed me against the door. I know this is physical abuse (and it has been happening for almost a decade, along with emotional abuse) and that I should call the police or talk to a psychologist (as I have depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts) but I’m scared that it will make everything worse. If I do tell someone, I might get separated from my family, which would be a relief, truly – but I can’t because that would mean never seeing my horse again and I can’t do that. She helps me with my depression and is literally the only thing keeping me from killing myself. My father is also emotionally and physically abusive.

I don’t know what to do.

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