So, we hugged and kissed today but i don’t know whats wrong with me.I am happy ofcourse but i dnt feel excited and i don’t really know if i am happy.I f****** dn’t know what the f*** is going on.Only if someone could give an explanation.Its a feeling like am numb,my heart didn’t beat,while kissing i was not excited like h**** but i just wanted the time to just stop when i was hugging him.What the f*** is it.Whats going on.Am not feeling guilty at all but something is going on in my mind maybe but i don’t know what.Maybe i know what it is and am scared or maybe i am scared to get hurt.But i am prepared already.What the f*** feeling is this.I do f****** like/love him alot like alot.And i care for him so much like i ever did for anybody else.Then why didn’t my heart beat like crazy when i hugged and kissed him.Why the f***?????
