I love going to the dog park down the road from my house. I don’t own a dog, but I get off on watching large, male dogs shitting. My next door neighbors Rottweiler mix squeezes out turds bigger than most pornstar c****, and he’s not very particular about cleaning up, so after he’s done, I go over, pick it up with a Ziploc I take with me, then go home and play with it in my bathtub. In summer, that means I eat it one huge log at a time while jerking off. In the winter, like it is now, I let it freeze, then I assfuck myself with one chunk while sucking the next one like a c***.

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