• 2 months ago
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I have a crush on my manager. I know realistically nothing will never, ever happen. I can think of at least 5 reasons why he can never find out. He’s really cute and I wish it could happen, but it can’t and won’t. I need to accept that. But until I do, I needed to get this off my chest. I can’t talk about it with anyone else.
1) I’m married and he has a girlfriend.
2) I’m pretty sure he doesn’t like me like that. He appreciates my work ethic and said I’m a “real one”, but that’s it.
3) There’s a whole ethics policy on why managers can’t date their employees, and I’m not discussing that with another manager. Even if he reciprocated and we ended our current relationships, one of us would have to change stores or quit. If it wasn’t handled right, at least one of us (probably him) would get fired. I’m not risking that. It’s not worth it.
4) If he didn’t feel the same, I’d have to quit on the spot out of embarrassment. I’d never be able to show my face in town again. I’d have to block everyone I know from the store.
5) I’m over 10 years older than him. He’s 19, I’m 30. It’s legal, we met as adults, but the age gap is kind of weird. He’s only a couple years older than my oldest nephew. That’s weird.
6) I don’t mean to talk down about myself but we’re nowhere near the same ballpark of attractiveness. I’m a 5/10 maybe, he’s a 20/10 at least. A 10/10 wouldn’t do him justice.
7) I don’t know anything about him outside of work. We can’t hang out outside of work, and I’d be too shy to ask even if we could. I’m socially awkward and don’t know how to talk about anything other than work.
I know eventually the feelings will go away. He’s already talking about transferring stores in a year. If I can get the money saved up, I plan to move back to my hometown. One day I won’t even remember his name. But until that day comes, it’s torture.

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