• 1 week ago

And btw if you are a woman, who I may have hurt in grade 6 when I left without a goodbye (yeah, it is possible, in fact I do believe it’s what happened) sorry, but you deserved that for making my me feel like a worthless piece of shit, and I do distinctly remember thinking “fuck her, I give up, I don’t want to see her again, I want to wipe the slate clean and move on to something new, and better”. You deserved that.

Then when I again saw you 10 years later and you saw me, there was a magnetism, and I left it at that… It might not have been your fault but so whatever…. It WAS a mutual attraction I was absolutely right at 11 years old, I played the game I called your bluff, it was your fault for being a cold hearted bitch. That’s why I walked and didn’t look back. I remember thinking that.

But we were kids. By the time our 20″s hit and we had another opportunity, there was definitely interest both ways but we were essentially strangers. And I wasn’t ready for it.

So yeah, I may have broke your heart, one of the few in life I can honestly say I really broke, but at the same time…. If you feel a need for revenge still, you want to get me and break my heart hurt me, push me around, take me for granted, whatever as the song goes…. It ain’t gonna happen. For what it’s worth, shortly after the second time, I ended hurt 30x harder than what I ever did to you, with the weight of 10 people on top of me, shit flying at me from all angles and now a single person I could turn to to talk about it for 8 years. 30x than what you got out of me. It did me in but it made me invincible. She got me bad enough not a person or scenario that could happen would break my heart. I’m a tough nut to crack so you better get over that. It won’t ever happen.

Grow up and get over it. That’s ridiculous. That hurt you feel is light Mickey Mouse. Not saying it was nice or you deserved it, I understand, but Jesus…. It was light and a long time ago. I won’t sleeve and always knew it would hurt you but I also always saw your point of view was it was a “power thing”. You were looking at it like I was holding the power cards. That’s not the way I saw it. That’s not what it was about. If you weren’t such a cold little bitch at 11, I was a good young guy who liked you, who you liked. I remember you playing my games with me talking about another guy right to me, a guy you liked telling me you though he was “cute as a lamb”. In those words. it hurt. Didn’t make me jealous, it hurt. it made me think “what do I have to do?” But that’s one of those things I thought about when I left without goodbye to start over some place else. A fresh start. Scratch it. Nix it.