• 1 month ago

An interesting article in Psychology Today called Why You Dont Always Have to Forgive.

The person saying people need to forgive sounds almost religious, and if thats the case, your opinion is pretty much null and void. Nobody can simple demand forgiveness, or tell someone to forgive its the right thing to do and expect it to happen. A person cant really force themselves to either, it needs to happen, rather than you make it happen. If its religious, well right there I know you would be someone who would actually believe you could read that this is what you need to do, and actually believe that it can just be done, which it cant, rather than knowing it from experience or by taking responsibility for your own thoughts. Who gives a shit what the bible says, what the fuck is YOUR opinion based on your life experience? Is it as easy as just flipping the switch? Ok I forgive. But my brain says otherwise. Especially if you look at the entire situation where the forgiveness needs to come and it could be anything on top of what this article talks about, murder, rape, whatever, having your life ruined in many wayw. None of these are my experience, but it could be applied to any experience. No doubt when it comes to certain things, petty bs, sometimes with little time easy it's easy to let bygons be bygons, but certain certain things if they are heavy enough, life running shit, if a person can get away from that, live through it and keep going no matter how hard, accept it, and proceed with the rest of their life, thats good enough. It might even be more than is what was expected.You  That's better than dwelling on shit. Sometimes forgiveness, people expecting forgivess to them it could mean it gives them special priveledges like hanging out or a relationship on some level or whatever, its a foot in the door just for example, bt the problem is the person who needs to fogive wants nothing to do with them. In other words putting ANY bit of energy into something so negative, is not what the person needs in life, possibly ever again. Forgiveness is a worse option in that case than letting it go walking away from it accepting he circumstances. Especially if there is no active, unprovoked negative shit going n in the head of the person that needs to forgive. The are no angry, seeking them out to ruin their life, vengence, that kind of thing, they just never want to be around them ever again and never have to put anything into it again.

Maybe the better advice is if you care about something, you better god damn well recognize it and think about what the fuck you do to it while you still have a chance to make an impression.

Simply Confess