It is very frustrating to me when I do what I consider to be “the right thing” only to observe no appreciable results.

There are many examples of this in my life, but I will relate the one that is perhaps the most frustrating.

I am a single, stay-at-home father to my disabled child (autism, epilepsy and mental retardation), whose mother passed away some years back.

My child was, for 20 years, living in a group home, seemingly a reasonable situation, especially for the group home, which received around $100,000 annually for his care. I note that “his care” entailed food, housing, daily personal care, but nothing really medical (it wasn’t like he was bed-ridden, or in a wheelchair, or needed a full-time nurse…stuff like that).

Beyond those $100,000/year living costs, there were the transportation costs (to and from “work”), the costs of providing him a “job,” and the medical costs, which, by all accounts, at least matched the $100,000/year non-medical expenses. So my guess is that my son cost taxpayers roughly $200,000 annually.

The truth of the matter is, just as it’s not my job to care for your children or otherwise fund your child-rearing effort, it’s not your job to care for my children or otherwise fund my child-rearing effort. The fact that my child has a disability does not alter that. And the fact that the government forcibly takes money from others to fund my child-rearing effort also does not alter that.

Now, if others voluntarily choose to offer funds, so be it. This voluntary support is at the core of humanity, is it not?

Anyway, I removed my son from the group home and moved him in with me. That was three-plus years ago.

In so doing, I have saved taxpayers roughly $700,000.

SEVEN-HUNDRED-THOUSAND DOLLARS!

Throughout these past three-and-one-half years I have “invested” my own money – retirement and insurance (from his mother’s death) to care for him.

Now, it’s all but gone. I have barely $1,000 to my name, no job and no family/friends who have come to offer assistance.

As pathetic (and true) a story as this is, the “do the right thing” part gets more ridiculous when one considers that neither of the churches with which I was associated for a time has been of any help:

1) and that’s after I gave a working washer/dryer set and money for vehicle repairs to the pastor’s family of one church, along with a telescope to a daughter in that same family;

2) I stopped attending the second church after my son had a loud (and very public) seizure there, after which NOT ONE PERSON REACHED OUT TO ME even to this day (more than a year later);

3) during my time at that second church (and even afterwards, in one case) I visited with church people regarding their particular health issues, and still NOT ONE PERSON HAS REACHED OUT TO ME.

Where is the “love”? Where is the support? Where is the encouragement, and burden-bearing called for in the Bible?

So, here I sit…trying to find work with a good and honorable company that will give me the flexibility to continue to stay home with my son…only to realize that help is not coming.

I would just like someone to explain to me why someone should do “the right thing.”

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