Last year I was in a long term relationship. We broke up but kept in touch. A few months after we broke up, I met someone, initially for a hook up then we found we had lots in common & really enjoyed each others company. It started to blossom and although I was guarded, I ended up in time falling head over heels for him. He was very cautious, it takes a long time for him to admit his feelings but he did with me quite soon. We’d been seeing each other for around 3 months when we went away together & it was amazing. We spent most of our time together after that, I’d stay with him during the week and my work friends got to know him. It was intense, passionate and one of the greatest feelings I’ve ever experienced.
Then a fantastic opportunity came up which would further my career, but it meant moving away for some time. He urged me to take it & I did. That proved to be the death of us. Our work schedules didn’t fit at all and my role had me working so much I barely had any days off. It put a lot of strain on us.
Then one day, he stopped talking to me. I think he’s blocked my number & doesn’t answer anything. I think it got too much for him but I don’t know. I miss him so much and I can’t tell him that.
A few weeks after that, my ex who lives very close to where I work came to see me. We decided we could be friends and started hanging out. It made me realise I’d missed my ex a lot. Skip to a few months down the line and I’m now back with my ex. I feel an awful person because although I love and care for him, I know I will always have the guy I met in my heart. My feelings for him will stay with me for a long time. I really hope he’s alright and he’s out there finding his own happiness. I have a void inside that only he filled but, I will happily live with that void if it means he’s happy.

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