Today’s Father’s Day and I’m sat ugly crying on my own. I’ve done everything I can to distract myself and the moment I snap, the moment I finally snap emotionally, I’m told I’m in the wrong. I’m always wrong, I’m always angry, I’m always doing something wrong.

I can’t live like this. I can’t go on feeling like I’m always wrong. I can’t express any emotion without it being seen as angry. Passion, fear, joy… I get told off for being me.

When did I learn that I had to apologise for being myself. When did I turn into someone who apologises for having emotions and showing them.

I can’t even get fired up about anything without being told to keep it down. Maybe I am angry. Maybe I’m angry at being told how to be, and who to be and what to say and do all the damn time. Nobody else tells me to change who I am, so why do you get to?

I wouldn’t feel like this if it weren’t for him.

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