Why do I bother, I hope I don’t wake up tomorrow or any day after that. Everyone that I want to care about me is more happy with anyone and anything else. How can you be so blind when it comes to me recently. I am sorry I annoy you to the point you want nothing to do with me for weeks at a time.
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If you have family, find out more about their lives too. It seems you are citing rejection here. It may have started a generation or more before you. It can be ended through a prayer. It’s a tool that the enemy uses to end lives of many people. Don’t fall for it.
Pray about this. Study The Bible daily and think about Jesus. Jesus loves you. You are of great importance to Christ.