Any advice would be appreciated. It’s been nearly 20 years now since I was ripped out of my home 3 times by child protective services. Needlessly. It has created me to have anxiety and a hole in my heart.
I have dated several guys and broke two engagements because of my fear to have children. Don’t get me wrong, I want to be a mother deep down. However, I worry about attachment. What if I can’t bond with my husband and children for fear of losing them to a corrupt government agency? I want to heal but as long as CPS exists I don’t know if that’s possible. Sometimes, I wish I could kill every social worker in cold blood for what they have done to me psychologically. All CPS is good for is destroying families and leaving lifelong emotional scars on children.

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