i used to be a loner till college. now i’m a sophomore and i have a lot of friends. our campus is real small so all of us live literally next door. we were this group of 8 friends (4 girls and 4 guys – i’m a girl) who spent almost every waking moment out of class together in our freshman year. then one guy sort of got detached, and now the rest of the guys in the group dont talk to him. but i’m still ok with him, and i speak to him sometimes, and the others get mad about it. and then i have a senior friend who doesnt feel comfortable hanging out with these guys so i hang out with him separately. this annoys the gang too. now one of the girls is dating one of the guys and they skip out too, so the two guys left are always blaming me for trying to further break up the group…the girls try to be more understanding, but they agree with the boys mostly, and it hurts.
recently one of my classmates, a very nice guy, has become a rel good friend, since he came to me for some help, and then we started to talk…
plus i like to sing and so a few friends from class got together to form a band. it;s me and three guys. these three are also immense fun to hang out with. and when we’re jamming, i love the feeling. and these three view me as one oftheir good friends.
umm, ok to avoid confusion, i’ll have to name these guys as The Senior, The Band , The Gang and The Classmate.
now, the band and the classmate are all cool if i dont get time to hang out with them much,and the senior will grumble a bit till i give him a solid reason, but the Gang keeps rubbing it in. i dont want to hurt any friend but it’s really painful that if i make my pown choices, these guys ignore me. it;s childish and rather hyper-possessive of them, i know, and i did at one time, in a burst of fury, tell them that i’ll quit, but they begged me to come back. i cant handle so many friends, especially since i was too much ofa misfit before college, and havent really changed. everytime i hang out with one of these four i’m always feeling guilty about ditching the rest. it;s not really a choice i can make easily…and it hurts every day.