i hate myself most of the time. i have such a good life now, with caring loved ones and an amazing boyfriend, but i still feel like s***. i’ve been taking all of my meds, but sometimes it’s still not enough. oftentimes i wish i could just pop out of existence, never to been seen or heard from again, just so i can escape the pain that i still feel. i don’t deserve to feel this bad anymore. i’ve been out of all the s***** situations i’ve been through in my life for years now, and i don’t deserve to be so upset anymore. hell, i don’t even know if i’ve truly experienced everything i think i have, or if i’ve just been lying to myself about lying to myself this whole time. how am i supposed to know? maybe i’m just like my birth mom after all; insane, hopeless, needing to be locked up in a f***** psych ward.
i dunno, i just feel like s*** sometimes