it’s been years but i still haven’t gotten over you. it doesn’t matter if you hurt me or if what we did was wrong. i miss you telling me you loved me. i miss talking about intimate things with you, even if a lot of it was wrong. i miss talking about shipping things with you and me secretly wishing we were talking about us. i miss laughing with you and crying with you. i miss looking forward to just talking to you. i miss the little calls we used to have and telling each other about our day. i miss saying good morning and good night to you and feeling like life couldn’t get better than when we were together. i miss the years i spent waiting to tell you i loved you and the happiness i felt the moment you accepted me when i did. the thing i regret most about our relationship was me. even if you did bad things, the person i used to be will always be the worst part to me. i wish we could try again now that we’ve both changed. i wish i could fall completely in love with you. i wish we could see the world in each other’s eyes. i wish we could experience the world together. i wish i could tell you i’m still in love with you but we barely even talk. we didn’t talk for probably over a year even if we’ve started talking again now. even if we did still talk as much as we used to, you don’t deserve to have to know i still haven’t moved past it. i don’t miss the bad parts of what we had but i miss you. i want to show you that i’ve changed and that i trust you. i want to show you that you could be with me and not have to deal with some kid that hates themselves anymore. i want to show you that i’m a positive and happy person now, even if life still isn’t perfect. i want us to be happy together like i always wished we’d get to be. i want us to have that silly little happy ending i always dreamed of for us. there’s so so much you don’t know about me now but i want you to know everything and i want you to want me. i want you to love me. i want to love you. i want us to be each other’s worlds. it feels like we were made for each other. if you see this and you know it’s me, i’m sorry. i know you’ve gotten over what we had by now, and you deserve to. but sometimes i wish you’d tell me you still love me. sometimes i wish you felt the same. sometimes i wish you never got over me.
