I’m 23 and I suffer from sociopathy (got diagnosed at 12) and it made my life hell. I didn’t cry at my Mother’s funeral and I shrugged when they told me that my Grandfather was dying of cancer. I couldn’t help it. I simply didn’t feel. I can’t feel anything.
Step-Mom and Stepsis are weirded out by it. Dad understands, says his brother was like me too. Uncle Jake taught me how to live with it. I know how I’m supposed to act and supposed to feel but I can’t feel.
I thought I can’t. I thought I could never mame real friends or fall in love.
I made a connection to this one guy, Ryan. Ryan is two years younger than me and he was this bubbly optimistic and childish lad. I genuinely like him and I think I have feelings for the first time. For him. I told him about my condition but he didn’t care. He liked me.
It wasn’t intentional but i started manipulating him. Making him love me and want only me im his life. I only realised it was manipulation when he moved in with me. I’m doing what my therapist told me to avoid. I’m controlling him but I don’t feel guilty.
I know its wrong. But I can’t stop.