i recently became friends with a blockmate in college. he’s a cool guy all in all. he despises being touched especially in certain ways, which is unfortunate because i really, really, really, really want to touch him. in every sense of the word. and i think i have, emotionally. but not as intense or as debauched as i would like. he’s a very soft boy; he’s gentle and he’s too kind, almost infantile. sometimes i feel like i want to ruin him. i want him to be mine. i want him. i sometimes say that to him as a joke, and all he would say in return is, “yeah. okay. i should be.” and it doesn’t help the need in me. i’m a good person. i really am. i try to help him when i can. i care about him. but i can be really possessive. and i want nothing more than to have him all for myself. i don’t want to share him with anyone else.

• Share on Facebook