I consistently think about killing myself. I feel guilty for the things I’ve done and the person I’ve betrayed by keeping this secret. I fantasize about how I would kill myself if my secret got out. Sometimes I imagine that she would forgive and save me. Usually I imagine the more likely scenario that she would hate me and not care if I die. I don’t even know where I might see myself down the road. I honestly don’t think I’m strong enough to make it to 30. Heck, I’m not sure I’ll see 25. I’m sorry Elizabeth.
- 6 years ago
- 301 Views
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I understand I feel the same I’ve kept a lot of secrets and I’ve done things that I should die because and I did these when I was very young and I grew up telling a different story and sometimes I think its actually true I fucking hate it and I’m scared I won’t make it past 18 because of the people I’ll hurt by dying is the only thing keeping me alive