True story but I met this dude named George Ouzounian who had a popular website called The Greatest Page In The Universe. He goes by Maddox. We met at comicon and he invited me back to his room to look at his new book.
When I walked into the room he said “first look at this” and unzipped to display a very sad, tired looking little penis. He looked down and said “don’t fail me now George Jr!” and started rubbing it vigorously.
I stood there waiting for him to get hard or put it away and show me his book when neither happened. Suddenly he said “GET OUT OF HERE!” and I said alright and calmly walked outside.
When I saw him back at comicon again he kept turning his head all the way around so he wouldn’t notice me.