• 3 years ago
  • 193 Views

Forgiveness is soo hard to feel. Some of the guys here are really sick. I hate them. I hate how judgmental they are. Self Righteous. I just feel sad. I want to become a better version of myself. I just pray I never attract a guy like the guys here who have been abusive to women.

I’m currently in a loving relationship with a wonderful man. He is amazing. He is not only someone I love but he is someone I deeply respect. Oh he isn’t perfect. He makes a lot of mistakes. But he is a dear friend. (and he happens to be s***) We met last year. He was sweet and kind. If a little awkward and a little geeky. But I happen to like that in a man. I want to “reinvent” myself. Shock the heck out of him. I lost approx 75 lbs. I have more to go. But I know I will succeed. I deliberately hide my pics now. I don’t let him see what I look like. I plan on getting my hair done (with a few high lights) and a new wardrobe. When I see him again this Spring. I earned it after such hard work to be thinner and healthier. He loved me when I wasn’t that attractive. He is a keeper. I’m not letting go unless I must. But he is a treasure I found quite by accident. I truly wasn’t looking when he and I Met. I had NO idea I could ever love or be loved soooo deeply. He asked me to marry him. He is incredible. I guess life does get better if you just don’t give up. I have a new career path and trajectory. He has been a huge miracle worker in my path. God sent him to me. I think he might just be my Mr. Right. I hope. Guess time will truly tell if he is destined for me. The blessing? When i said NO to all s***** intimacy. He didn’t run. He got to know me. I got to know him. He stayed. I still can’t believe its been 4 yrs now that he and I connected. I haven’t given up or run. (and nor has he). Its a little miracle in my life. I thank God for that gift of love.

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