Last night, I went on a second date with my dance partner out in San Francisco, and we spent 12 hours together going to a regetta race, having Chinese soup, go a Art and music festival, and a valentine poetry night. We came back to my place so that she could use the bathroom, and after which I showed her around place and sat on the sofa together. From there I started giving her a one hour back and foot massage, and after that we started to make out and she gave me a little f*******. This was unexpected and I did not ask for such a thing, but we were kissing so passionately that I felt that I needed to express myself to her after spending 12 hours and a additional hour massaging her, but it was my first time being given a f******* and I don’t understand why I should feel so bad or dirty about it. This was not my intention but it was something that just happened for the first time in my life, and I feel as though I needed it to help me be comfortable in my own body and express my caged intimacy with someone. I haven’t told anyone about this and I should keep it to myself from here on in, and I am still going to meet with my dance partner and treat her like a genuine lady and be respectable to her.
