I walked into my child’s room at caught her m*********** at 6 years old. It was very akward for me. I just walked out. I’m going to give her the spanking of her life later with a belt. She shouldn’t even be thinking of such things. What did I do wrong as a parent?
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the only thing you did wrong was thinking that what she is doing was wrong, she probably didn’t even know what she was doing and she should be able to feel what she wants
at 6 she has no idea what shes doing is sexual, its just a thing that feels good, but even if she did, why would you want to hurt your child for having sexual feelings after YOU came into her space? i bet youre the type to make jokes about women with daddy issues too. go to therapy and work on your misogyny instead of taking it out on your literal child.
I think I may be overreacting. It is difficult being a young single father. I have decided not to spank her with a belt or at all. Maybe I should have knocked on her door before entering. I’m glad I didn’t yell at her either. I just read an online article that said not to punish your child for that . Should I talk to her about it or just ignore it because she was in her private space? Please give me some advice. It would be appreciated- I’m only 24 and her mom passed away in child birth just two months ago.
i was the first commenter, you shouldn’t talk to her about it. just wait until she is old enough to give her “the talk” you shouldn’t bring up walking in on her though, it will only make her uncomfortable and not want to confide in you
she is just doing whats natural, talking to her about it when shes doing it in private would open her up early in life to the warped ideas we have about sexuality. if she does it in public (which kids sometimes do, usually as toddlers though) then all you need to do is explain that thats a private thing. i think you should see a therapist if its available to you as a single parent. i also think you should reevaluate physical punishment. heres a story from the author of pippi longstocking: When I was about 20 years old, I met an old pastor’s wife who told me that when she was young and had her first child, she didn’t believe in striking children, although spanking kids with a switch pulled from a tree was standard punishment at the time. But one day, when her son was four or five, he did something that she felt warranted a spanking–the first in his life. She told him that he would have to go outside himself and find a switch for her to hit him with. The boy was gone a long time. And when he came back in, he was crying. He said to her, “Mama, I couldn’t find a switch, but here’s a rock that you can throw at me.” All of a sudden the mother understood how the situation felt from the child’s point of view: that if my mother wants to hurt me, then it makes no difference what she does it with; she might as well do it with a stone. And the mother took the boy into her lap and they both cried. Then she laid the rock on a shelf in the kitchen to remind herself forever: never violence. And that is something I think everyone should keep in mind. Because if violence begins in the nursery one can raise children into violence.
Thank you for that. That story really opened my eyes. I’ve only spanked her maybe 5 times in her life (once with a belt). But I am doing some research online about other effective punishment methods…to be honest, I hated spanking my daughter and see her tears. Maybe I should go to a parenting class.
Any other parenting tips anyone could offer would be greatly appreciated. I want to raise a kind, loving, caring, intelligent, confident daughter.
honestly, based on seeing how honest you are with yourself with what you are doing wrong, I think you’re a great parent. Raising a kid is hard and as long as you learn from your mistakes and you love your child purely, your a great dad.❤️
My nephews had to be told that it’s a private thing that should be done in their room. That’s all. Shaming them so young for something that simply feels good will cause a whole lot of trouble for them mentally.
I am a teacher and often times I see my students that. Most times with children it’s how they cope with anxiety.
Also a good rule of thumb is to not overreact to things. Take time to cool down before initiating any punishment so that you can come at it level headed. That way you don’t have to apologize for being too harsh or back track because of the heat of the moment.
its normal dont punish her for it
if you think masturbation, at any age, is wrong then you are a piece of trash. Sexual exploration is a necessary and healthy part of life.
i agree
Stair at her with an angry face when she does it again