Sometimes I wish that I was

  • 10 years ago
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Sometimes I wish that I was Catholic, so that I could confess to someone, but I’m a Godless heathen, so I’ll just do it here:

– I’m a cocaine junkie. Have been for years. I became addicted to cocaibe after I, ironically lost my boyfriend to suicide, which was caused by cocaine-related psychosis. I am a nicer daughter, better colleague and a nicer citizen when I’m on coce, so no, I don’t feel guilty. Cocaine made me a better person. Hell, I’m on it right now. Can you tell?
– I’m an alcoholic.
– Freud would have fun with me. I didn’t have my dad when I grew up, and according to my shrink, that’s the reason that I sleep around. I also desperately try to win my dad’s approval by bringing home men that share his interests and ambitions. And no, he doesn’t like me any better for it.
– My dad beats me and physically threatens me, but honestly, it IS my own fault. I provoke him and I hurt him with my words.
– I pick my nose, and eat it too.
– When I’m not drinking, using coce, or gaining approval, laughter and intimacy from people that I love (or people that I am sleeping with), I feel worthless, and I just wanna crawl into my bed and die.
– My life is going nowhere; I have no ambitions.
– I hate all of the following people: Christians, Muslims, Messianic Jews (f****** traitors), racists, republicans, liber-f******-tarians, racists, homophobes, Greenpeace activists (you’re not selfless, you’re doing this for yourself), men who hate women, women who hate men, women who hate other women and call them names like ‘s***’ and ‘w****’, men who spend their whole f****** life at the gym and expect me to worship their c***, people who don’t eat food that they like when they’re not fat.

That’s it for now.

All Comments

  • I’m a Christian. I assume you hate me because of that fact, even though you’ve never met me and know nothing else about me. Well, you can hate me. But I’m going to pray for you anyway. I’m going to pray that you’ll find the inner strength to get away from your abusive dad, to find your self worth, and to realize that you deserve better than what you are giving yourself and doing to yourself. You can overcome your trials. Maybe the place to start would be viewing the world with less hatred and more love. And start by showing yourself love and care. I truly hope you’ll open your heart and mind to God because He can help you.

    Anonymous January 14, 2014 9:50 pm Reply

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