I’m a Mormon. I don’t want to be any more. I want to drink, smoke, and get wasted like I did before I converted. I want to sleep around. Problem is I could never leave my wife. I love her more than anything in this life. So I’m just going to church each week, fantasizing about other women, and dream about secretly drinking, which don’t actually do. Also I totally believe in the religion, but I know I’m not going to be saved because my heart is not in it. I get the worst of both worlds. No booze and no salvation, just great.
