• 8 months ago
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I’ve been thinking about killing myself more often than i like lately and idk. Just, with my finals coming up, in 40 days, i will have to work hard and i dont know if i can do that. And i feel very unlovable right now and at the same time feel guilty feeling this way because iam surrounded by friends who love me but still. I dont know. And id never actually kill myself i think but it would be so easy? It would solve all my problems, no school, not feeling lonely and sick… Just. Abaolutely nothing. Or hell, depends on what you believe i guess. But i am scared because im thinking of KILLING myself and thats NOT normal thats sick and wrong and awfully sad but i cant tell anybody about it because theyd all worry and i dont want that. I do go to therapy and i will talk to my therapist about it so that i am at least doing something but still. The problems are still very real and very much there. And i want to be skinny too and pretty and more clever and hard working and successful and likeable but. I just dont have the energy. I just want to lay in bed. I wanna die a lot on some days and it feels awful.

All Comments

  • I send you Love and Energy! And I hope you will decide for life – for it has so much more to offer than you see and experience right now. It is not about your looks, you being more skinny or a overachiever – it is about finding out what makes you happy! There is a path just for YOU and you will have a blissfull life if you realise that life is about living, not about requiering standards. Power and Love to You <3

    Anonymous February 10, 2018 11:21 pm Reply

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