I grew up with an abusive alcoholic father. When i was 11 a mentally disturbed man hang himslef in front of me. When i was 17 my girfriend who was my best friend in the world suicided the same night she begged me to come and see her and i decided to go drink with some guys i barely knew. Now, i am 24 and a well rounded person, but sometimes im so on edge that i feel like i will burst. I start lashing out for no reason, i get strong desires to numb myself with alcohol and drugs. These events are branded into my mind and dreams and i dont know how to stop it. My friends and family know bits and pieces about these events, but no one except my current SO knows the full story about why I have a hard time living with myself. Ive never told this to anyone other than her. Thank you for reading.
