PAST – I’ve been s******* abused as a kid. It haunted me for years and I’m not happy since then. I take antidepressants, have already tried suicide more than once and have physical marks on my body due to my past. PRESENT- I’ve met a guy, he’s lovely, we spent the greatest time together today and he touched me, where I let him (not s*******). But we didn’t kissed, I won’t stare him for too long or let him love me. I want him to love me, but I can’t let it behind. My body hurts with the contact, asking for it at the same time. I want him so badly, but It won’t let me.. I’m afraid he will leave, lettng my abuse win once more.
